As I lay in bed last night trying to get to sleep, my body exhausted but my brain going a mile a minute (do you not hate when that happens?) I began to reminisce about my days in high school.
Me, at one of the hardest times of my life during my high school days.
By no means was my high school days “normal” I did some of the normal things a high school kid did, I skipped a few classes, I hung out with friends during lunch, I failed a few tests because I never studied but in the grand scheme of things my high school days were not “average.” My high school years were the years I self harmed almost daily, in those years I dealt with domestic abuse, I dealt with a “full blown” eating disorder, I dealt with leaving public high school in grade nine to seek treatment for my mental health issues and being diagnosed properly. Up until my last year of high school my days were not just about school and friends, my days were mostly about my mental health, coping with my issues and being overwhelmed and to afraid to talk to anyone about it.
But finally I got to my fifth year of high school (due to missing most of grade nine, I had to make up for lost time with a fifth year) and other then a french class (which I surprisingly liked for being the only 18 year old in a grade nine course) my full year was filled with “open courses” (course’s that are chosen by the student, unlike English,math, science which are mandatory) I loved my fifth year, I finally found my “niche” my days were filled with classes about psychology, child development, child education, anthropology, and world religions.
Me and my favorite teacher, on my last day of high school!
I loved my days, my last semester was my favorite of all though, I woke up happy to go to school for the first time in my life, I didn’t worry about the way I looked as much, I didn’t care if I didn’t have many friends at the time,I wasn’t constantly worried about failing because I knew I understood the material. I just wanted to get to class, I loved my course’s of children education, my intro to psychology, sociology and anthropology, which was taught by my favorite teacher, she would joke with me constantly and was always there for me if I needed to talk, she was both fun and serious.
Me writing my first novel in my high school cafeteria
I loved my parenting course were we would weekly go to my old elementary school and work with the kindergarten children. If I could have I would have skipped through lunch and go straight to third period, my psychology course, learning about Freud, Skinner, and Jean Piaget, it’s the course that taught me all about children’s development. My other favorite teacher taught my world religions course, I had, taken his law course before which eased my way into a student teacher friendship with him when I returned the next year and took another course, I loved being able to speak with him about Christianity,the bible and other religions and felt like he was speaking to me with respect and not just as another student.
My fifth year in my eyes was obviously the best, I finally reached my goals of getting 90% and higher in more then one of my courses, I ended the year with the Family Studies certificate, and the World Religions subject award upon graduation. My fifth year taught me that I didn’t just like reading about psychology and taking care of children, I was actually good at it! The end of my high school career was hard, not just because I had to leave high school and my much loved teachers and loved librarian, but the way it ended, in the last two weeks of high school I not only had my first job interview, but I also had my first job acceptance, which needed me to be on site during the exam week, in one week I had to switch all of my exams to one day, finish them all and the next day head out to my first on site job just out of London. I wasn’t able to do the big “goodbye” to most of my teachers, and even to some of my friends due to them being busy with exams also.
It might amaze you after reading how almost 80% or more of my high school journey was filled with negatives I honestly wouldn’t change a thing about those high school days, I hate that I had to deal with domestic abuse, an eating disorder, cutting and suicidal thoughts when I should have been really only worrying about tests, boyfriends, future college courses and jobs, but that last year of high school made a positive ending which helps me accept the negatives in that part of my life.